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Toyshop

by Amanda White

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1.
Tell me, sweetness, what’s the worry if I have you one more time? Does it matter if the moonlight knows our secret? What’s the crime? Put your arms around my body, tell me that you’ll keep me warm. I won’t notice if you are the one who trembles at the storm Way out here. I would never disobey you, not for money, not for pride. Ring around my rosey finger claims me as your midnight bride. Comb the shadows, seek me through the twisted secrets of my lies. As the sparrow falls from Heaven, do you notice when it dies? Way out here, out here, you’ve made me wait so long. Out here, out here, pretending you belong beneath my gaze, you’ll slumber through my fear. Through endless days you’ll find me wasting away way out here. Sugar, sugar, don’t let go o’ me. If you know me, show me slowly.
2.
Toyshop 03:24
Bring your broken hearts into my toyshop. I will make you whole with my tools. I will hammer on your soft arteries ’til they make way for God’s love. Fools come from far away, bringing balls of clay for my hands to hold, mold, enfold. Come into my shop, my sweet lollipop. Shield yourself from the April cold. When you went away, I thought I heard you say “You’ll regret the day you didn’t take it all the way.” Hey-yay-yay don’t you come my way, won’t you bleed the day from your heart of clay singing hey-yeah, hey-yeah, no more lies. Come from solitude to my toyshop door. Come and say to me one more lie. Smile, I’m watching you. Watch me watching you. See the things I do with my eyes. When you bring me down, I feel all around, I taste every sound, I want more. Come in, ecstasy, exit empathy. Come and knock on my Toyshop door. When I went away, I turned back to say “You’ll regret the day you didn’t take me all the way.” Hey-yay-yay don’t you come my way, won’t you bleed the day from your heart of clay singing hey-yeah, hey-yeah, no more lies. When we went away, we turned back to say, “You’ll regret the day you didn’t wipe it all away.” Hey-yay-yay don’t you come my way, won’t you bleed the day from your heart of clay singing hey-yeah, hey-yeah, no more lies.
3.
This place shuts down at 2 o’clock We go outside and take a walk We wish that we were 21 But being legal kinda takes out all the fun I wish we had a set of wheels I’d wear my 4-inch leopard heels I’m getting blisters on this street When I get home you better kiss my sexy feet Monica’s getting her tits done She’ll be the hottest piece in Boston I never thought it was all about me ‘Til I found out that it is I am the sun You’ve never met a girl like her And she’ll make sure that you concur No one except for maybe me I’ll let you go but I can never set you free Monica’s getting her tits done She’ll be the hottest piece in Boston I never thought it was all about me ‘Til I found out that it is I am the sun You can worship me Build all your gods to me Circle your life ’round me Burn for me Die for me Hot, can you handle it Blind, you can’t look at me I’ll send your world up in flames if you fuck with me I think you know the score I’ll make you want it more If you walk out the door You won’t get two blocks This town shuts down at 2 o’clock We’ll beat the clock Let’s rock Monica knows the game She knows it’s name She knows the rules She has you fooled Those pretty eyes Think fast She’s gone She lied It’s on Poor you Round 2
4.
Vision 03:59
I had a vision of you crying in the cold. Through sobs you called out my name, begging me to hold you. And as you cried, your tears caught in the sun. And I saw they were beads of jewels, every one. I had a vision of you standing by the willow tree. You knew I was all alone, so you said a prayer for me. I saw you in my mind, how I held you tight for you were sad and afraid, frightened in the night. I said, “I’ll protect you, don’t worry, hon.” You laughed, “You’ll protect me, huh, little one?” And I just nodded at you, and you knew, in that moment you knew. You looked down at me so still and you said, “Yeah, I guess you will.” Every night I close my eyes I hear your voice inside me. I feel your breath upon my neck. I know that you’re beside me. And I pray to the gods that made us to be That you’ll find your way back to me. That soon I can squeeze your hand and we’ll find us a happy end. And now I feel your eyes searching for my soul. Wondering if I’m still here with you, begging just to hold you. If only you knew these visions are true. If only you knew I’m still here for you.
5.
'Kay 05:33
Run away. That’s all I can say to you. Hold me. Tell me you’ll be back again someday. Leave behind all my love had promised you. From now on, I’ll just be in the way. Don’t look at me, don’t look at me. There’s nothing I can– Don’t look at me, don’t look at me. Get out before I– ‘Kay. I promise not to turn you over. But me, I’m so weak, so small, so helpless in it all. Don’t leave your life to me. Don’t leave your life to me. There’s nothing I can do To save you save you. Can you say you’ve nothing to hide from me no more? I don’t think I would believe you anyway. But go ahead. I just want to hear it from your voice. I’ll pretend everything’s okay. Don’t scream at me, don’t scream at me. There’s nothing I can– Don’t scream at me, don’t scream at me. Get out before I– ‘Kay. I promise not to turn you over. But me, I’m so weak, so small, so helpless in it all. Don’t leave your life to me. Don’t leave your life to me. There’s nothing I can do To save you, save you. And I say, and I say Don’t worry what I’ve got, because I’ve got a life to live. And I won’t worry whether not you’re gonna take what you can give. I can handle it. I always do. I can handle it, but how ’bout you? And I know, and I know that someday you’ll be back beneath the guidance of the wind, And I know somewhere you’ll be fine within your sin. After all, it’s you. After all, it’s only true. And I say, and I say Don’t worry what I’ve got, because I’ve got a life to live. And I won’t worry whether not you’re gonna take what you can give. I can handle it. I always do. I can handle it, but how ’bout you? And I know, and I know that someday you’ll be back beneath the guidance of the wind, And I know somewhere you’ll be fine within your sin. After all, it’s you. After all, it’s only true.
6.
Are you trippin' boy, you think I'd let you come along? The wind is all I need to turn me on. I've got the sun in my hair, I've got wings, I've got the air, And echoed in my ears I've got the song. Uh-uh-uh-oh, uh-uh-uh-oh The sky is close, I feel the sun. Uh-uh-uh-oh, uh-uh-uh-oh And now is where I come undone No one has been around and around my orbit like you. It’s true. “Let go, let go” my heart keeps calling. If you can’t keep up you’ll fall right down, you’ll fall right down, and if you fall there’ll be no turning back. And as you slip through the cracks, take a breath, try to relax. And brace your body, brace for the impact. Uh-uh-uh-oh, uh-uh-uh-oh The sky is close, I feel the sun. Uh-uh-uh-oh, uh-uh-uh-oh And now is where I come undone. No one has been around and around my orbit like you. It’s true. “Let go, let go” my heart keeps calling. So enthralling If you heard what I heard, you saw what I saw, then nary a word could call you away. But say what you will, I’ll say what you won’t, You’ll say “Darling, don’t.” Uh-uh-uh-oh, uh-uh-uh-oh The sky is close, I feel the sun. Uh-uh-uh-oh, uh-uh-uh-oh And now is where I come undone No one has been around and around my orbit like you. It’s true. “Let go, let go” my heart keeps calling. ooo Uh-uh-uh-oh, uh-uh-uh-oh The sky is close, I feel the sun. Uh-uh-uh-oh, uh-uh-uh-oh And now is where I come undone.
7.
The Reason 03:44
Having sex with you is like pulling teeth, yeah The best days we went through weren't worth the least, yeah And I know you wanna take me back And I know our time is through ‘Cause your love isn’t worth your bullshit And that’s the only reason I hate you. You’ve got so much drama and you’re no fun, yeah And when we go out you wreck it for everyone, yeah And I know we’ve got some things to say Only that I think you’re gay, and that’s okay, But your love isn’t worth your bullshit And that’s the only reason I hate you. Whoah whoah whoah whoah You’re the last man on earth, I’ll go fuck a baboon Procreation’s not worth all the crap that you spew For the last time, it’s the last time. If you love a butterfly, set it free, yeah If you hate it all the better if you ask me, yeah If you’re done with talking all your smack Go away and don’t come back ‘Cause your love isn’t worth your bullshit And that’s the only reason I hate you. And that’s the only reason I hate you Douche.
8.
A Carol 03:57
One was the call, and one was the fall, And one was the hope of all: Knowing that death, for all that it’s worth Must have its start in birth. Come down from your lair Come burning the air Oh Silent night, Silent night, Star of wonder, star of light. Burning bright, holy night, Guide us to thy perfect light. Come from the sky, oh do or we die. Answer your children’s cry. Remembering when you walked among men, Set foot on the Earth again. Come down from your lair Come burning the air Oh Silent night, Silent night, Star of wonder, star of light. Burning bright, holy night, Guide us to thy perfect light. Away in a manger all time comes to solidfiy. Away in a stable the Lord of the Earth learns to cry. Oh king of creation, who are you to come in this way, To blast through the atmosphere, landing asleep on the hay. Give us your peace or give us your sword, Just don’t keep us waiting, Lord. The earth is aflame, our hearts are the same. Establish your holy name. Come down from your lair Come burning the air Oh Silent night, Silent night, Star of wonder, star of light. Burning bright, holy night, Guide us to thy perfect light.
9.
Snowshadow 02:54
No sound of footsteps, you don't cast a shadow. Silently you die on my breath without a scream, without screaming. Grains from Heaven's realm, I crush you beneath me. Do you feel the pain that I bring, or do you dream, are you dreaming? You give your life for the warmth of human touch. Only the frozen realize that it's worth that much. You fall like an angel, conquering the darkness down below. Yet in an hour you are sacrificed to the sun's soft glow. If all the stars up in the sky grew cold and lost their glow They'd touch us one last time and fall to Earth as snow. In the cold lamplight, you shine like a rainbow, And I thought I saw you cast a shadow...
10.
Pull Me Up 05:54
Early in the winter it’s still raining, though it’s cold. Sunlight breaks the morning- oh don’t touch me, eyes of gold. ‘morrow I’ll be sleeping where the rainbows won’t appear. Somehow it makes me feel better just to realize my time is near. Mother, can you hear me? I’m waiting for your call. Hurry to your baby. I can’t make it alone to where you are. Someone’s wishing for me, hear their whispers on the wind. But what can I tell them? My hands are empty, filled with sin. Satan, please forgive me. You’re the last one I’ll betray. Preacher, is it sinning? To hurt the devil, is that okay? Mother, can you hear me? I’m waiting for your call. Hurry to your baby. I can’t make it alone through the night. I can’t make it alone through the night. I can’t make it alone to the light. I can’t see the light. No I can’t reach the stars from my own two feet I can’t climb my way to the mountain peak I can’t lift my corpse from off of the street I can’t hear a thing, mama lemme hear you speak. Reach out your hand and pull me up, mama Pull me up Mama pull me up, mama pull me up Mama pull me up, mama pull me up Mama pull me up, please pull me up Please pull me up, please pull me up Please pull me up, pull me, Pull me, pull me, pull me up…

credits

released September 24, 2009

Music and lyrics: Amanda White
Vocals: Amanda White
Guitar and Bass: Ross Byron
Drums: Vincent Ambrose
Production: Martin Bisi
Mastering: Fred Kevorkian

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Amanda White Salem, Massachusetts

Classically trained singer who performs both opera and original rock.

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